The past few
weeks months have been terrifying, nerve-wracking, depressing, and scary. My friends and family have also been subjected to my constant irritable and grouchy behavior. I have been preparing for my preliminary examination and everything seems to be coming together (very) slowly. I have woken up to sweaty nightmares about missing deadlines, submitting a complete crap proposal to my committee, and being told that my “scientific caliber” is not up to the mark to pursue an academic career (gulp!)
The first week of November is officially my “prelim week” and I will continue to go through series of mini heart-attacks and one too many mood swings until then. What exactly is a preliminary examination, you ask? Well, also called as the “candidacy exam”, or “the OP” (short for the original proposal – mostly followed in life sciences, I think), it is an examination that PhD students are required to take (and pass) in order to officially become PhD candidates. Many schools and department do this differently, and I can only tell you what is done in my program. Here is a short excerpt about the exam from our handbook –
“The purpose of the Preliminary Examination is to stimulate you to develop original research ideas and to assess your academic knowledge, preparation and ability to analyze and synthesize the literature on and surrounding your topic. In the written proposal, you are expected to provide the examination committee with adequate background and details to understand the current state of the chosen field of research and to evaluate your proposed experiments. The oral examination allows the committee the opportunity to test your knowledge of the chosen research project, your ability to formulate and address a few research questions to anticipate the types of results to be obtained, and to evaluate your understanding of its scientific foundation. The examination will not only assess the science involved in the proposal but also will evaluate the quality of the presentation and the writing.”
Basically, we are required to come up with an original idea – a topic that is not our main thesis research, write a hypothesis-driven research proposal in the NIH Exploratory/Developmental Research Grant (NIH R21)-type format, and defend it in front of our prelim committee (which is different from our thesis committee and consists of new members). The proposal must be original and designed to advance the current state of knowledge in the chosen field. It cannot be based on our own (current or previous) research projects. Also, our advisor cannot critique the research proposal prior to submission of the proposal to the prelim committee. The whole process takes almost 8-9 months and I have briefly summarized the timeline of the process below –
March-April 2017: Brainstorming ideas for the topic; Reading, reading, and more reading. (My topic is about the role of myeloid-derived suppressor cells or MDSCs in mediating pancreatic beta-cell death in Type 1 Diabetes, which is an autoimmune disorder.)
May 2017: Topic approval by the program office.
June-August 2017: Literature review; Brainstorming ideas and key questions for experiments, techniques, aims, etc; Beginning to write… maybe…
August 2017: Prelim committee assigned; Serious writing and reviewing (rinse, repeat); More reading.
September 2017: First draft completion; Review by peers, friends, and colleagues; Schedule date and time for the oral defense with committee; MORE READING.
October 2017: Submission of written proposal to the program office and prelim committee (4 weeks prior to oral defense); Approval of proposal for oral defense (or, revise and resubmission of proposal aka “your proposal is indefensible at this stage and requires more work”); Practicing oral talk (aka “pre-prelim talk”).
November 2017: Defense! Drinking and crying (if pass); Drinking and crying (if fail); New sense of purpose in life.
A few weeks into this process (around May), the horror stories start – stories about seniors failing their defense and “Mastering out” (which is seen in a really bad light), stories about committee member issues, stories about inadequate writing, etc. I have heard one too many stories about people dealing with depression and constant stress during the period of writing and oral defense. There are tons of useful advice about what to do and what not to do during the process. Of course, the experience is unique and different for every student but it would certainly be easy if I could get on with it without constantly being traumatized by every little detail (like feeling guilty every minute that I’m not thinking about my OP or working on it).
However, a few things have indeed helped me so far:
- Finding a studying/writing spot outside of work and my apartment. I have been working at WALC until wee hours of night these days. (WALC is the active learning center on campus and is always hustling and bustling with students.) Just being among other students and the white noise in the background seems to be a great environment to focus and get stuff done.
- Biking to and from work every day (around 6.5 miles). My friend recently convinced me to buy a bike and I must say that it has helped me get around the campus faster and save a ton of time. Not to forget the kick of endorphins in the morning that helps me focus on my experiments in the lab and plan things more effectively through the day. I spend most of the mornings doing cell culture work (I get done with this the first thing in the morning in order to make time for meetings and other experiments through the day) and afternoons on tissue processing and protein work. This gives me sufficient time from evening until late night to work on my OP.
- Eating regularly, but not fussing over cooking. Most of the time spent on cooking and cleaning can be replaced by quickly grabbing something to eat on the go. (I can hear my sister squeaming at this already!)
TalkingRanting to friends, especially colleagues about the OP, work, life, and everything in general to relieve all the stress. I am fortunate to be on the same boat as many folks who can relate to my situation and listen to my rambling.
- Reading something completely un-related to my research or the OP over the weekends. I have read three books in the past few months (check out my reading list!).
Alright, I should probably get back to work now (this was some major procrastination and I am feeling guilty already). Perhaps I should talk about my topic in detail on the next post. Until then, I will try to keep calm and carry on.